Coping with what I already have

Have you heard of the Duggar's, the family from Arkansas with 17 children ranging in age from 20 years to 9 months old? The most recent edition of Home Life magazine has a feature on their family and I found it a very valuable - if not convicting - read.

Almost everyone that has heard of the Duggar's and their large family has an opinion about them, including myself. Personally, I just haven't been able to see how everyone seems so clean and well-mannered. Certainly that's not how they really are, right? I mean, they almost seem plastic they are so close to perfect.

But when I read this article about them it answered a lot of my questions and explained much about their lifestyle. In the Duggar home, Christ comes first. As a follower of Christ who is also father to four children of my own, I would like to think that Christ is always first in my home. But it's not always that way. It takes lots of work to manage regular family devotions and when schedules are busy, families don't just naturally gravitate in that direction. I was impressed at how the Duggars make that a priority in their home and I am encouraged to be much more diligent in leading my wife and children in Bible study.

Perhaps what moved me the most was the testimony of the father, Jim Bob (yes, that's his real name). He seems such an even keel kind of person but he said he wasn't always that way. It wasn't until he started to have children that he realized that he had a bit of an anger problem. Raising his voice at the kids was a regular occurrence, one that was rarely ever productive. Jim Bob became convicted of this and now his wife and children hold him accountable to his anger. If he raises his voice or speaks out in anger, they call him on it.

I confess that I am the same way when it comes to speaking to my children. As hard as I've tried to discipline in the correct way, sometimes the "daddy voice" as I like to call it reigns the day and I wind up raising my voice to them in anger. I know that my children hear the tone of my voice and rarely my words when that happens and that I do much more damage than good when I do. So I've committed to the Lord and have asked my family to help me with how I speak to the kids when they are in the wrong.

If you haven't done so already, do a little research on the Duggar family. They will be the first to tell you that having a large family is something that they feel called to do and that it certainly isn't for everyone. Once you get past the initial "How in the world do they do that?" reaction, you'll find that they can offer a lot of wisdom and encouragement to those who are planning on or already have children of their own.