Losing the 'o' in good

A pastor that I heard preach this past weekend delivered a sobering point during his sermon.  He said that my generation (the 30-40 crowd) is the second generation removed that delivers consistent discipline to our children.  Our grandparents were the last to really "lay down the hammer."  Our parents were a little squeamish to discipline their children, instead choosing to let us learn from our mistakes rather than trying to prevent them.  This means that I am part of the current generation who is continuing that trend.  He didn't offer any proof for his assertion but he didn't have to.  As a parent of 4 children and as one who spent the last 20 years in student ministry, I would say that his assessment is spot on.

Just recently I had a discussion with a woman whose older teenage daughter was wrestling with some moral issues.  Her daughter had been "raised in church" but she was struggling to make right decisions.  She told me that her daughter was a "good girl" who didn't do things like do drugs.  I thought about that statement for some time.  Is it our goal as parents to raise kids who are good or is there more to it?

I believe with all my heart that the goal of parents is not to raise children who are good but rather children who are godly.  There are lots of people in this world that we would consider good, and many of them might even be considered exceptional.  But God has not called us to be only good.  Instead, He has called us to be holy, pursuing the very face of God.

Proverbs 22:6 tells us that we are to, "Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not depart from it."  This verse is often misunderstood.  Does it mean that if my child strays from the faith or the way that I raised him/her that I am a total failure as a parent?  No, what it does mean is that when we raise our children to know and fear the Lord and they understand that our lives are founded on Christ, then no matter what decisions they make in the future they will still know and understand that foundation.  Even if they choose to walk away from the faith altogether, they won't be able to escape the biblical truths that we have instilled in their lives which will forever be ingrained in their hearts.

I want my children to be good people, but more than anything my desire is for them to be God's.  We can seeks explanations for what ails our society and seek counsel from countless psychiatrists and psychologists to explain why our kids are the way they are.  Yet if we are committed to raise them in the truth of the Christ and a biblical worldview, I sincerely believe we'll have less explaining to do and more examples to live by.